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 Crappy pick up lines!

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noni
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 4:34 am

hahah the funniest i ever got was... well it wasnt really a pick up line as just complete oh sweet moses!!! we were chatting away and ya know it was all flirty and the likes then he just goes "would it be illegal if i kissed you?" we didnt actually end up kissing cos he got pissed off cos i couldn't stop laughing at him!!!!!!! hahahahha
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wayfarer
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:01 pm

"I wish you were my homework so i could do you on my table"

Got this from a 12 year old school kid on a bus.

Fucking smooth.
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Mark Narra
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:09 pm

i'm incredibly terrible at trying to pick up girls. i tend to just fall ass-backwards into intimacy. but when i try, it's priceless.

the last great one i remember was when i was 16. i was at dunkin donuts with a few friends of mine after smoking, probably at midnight, when they were about to close. we always went there and tried to charm the 40 year old woman into giving us extra donuts. this particular night, we ended up with 7 or 8 extra each, and sat down next to two really cute girls. my friends kept whispering about hitting on them, but didn't make a move. finally, i got fed up and decided to take action. i leaned over and came up with this gem.

"yo. ya'll want some donuts?"

that was really the best i could come up with.
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lex
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:19 pm

It probably would have worked on me. But I would have ruined it by saying, sorry...I'm vegan.
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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:20 pm

And did they get your donuts?
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wayfarer
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:22 pm

lex wrote:
It probably would have worked on me. But I would have ruined it by saying, sorry...I'm vegan.

i'm having the chef from work cook me a vegan cake tomorrow in memory of my ex for what would have been his 24th. he was vegan too.
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Mark Narra
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:27 pm

lex wrote:
It probably would have worked on me. But I would have ruined it by saying, sorry...I'm vegan.

i don't know, man. i was pretty thug life back then. you'd also have been 12.
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lex
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:32 pm

I'm into the older dudes Mark, ya know.
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Johnny99
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:36 pm

Mark Narra wrote:
i'm incredibly terrible at trying to pick up girls. i tend to just fall ass-backwards into intimacy. but when i try, it's priceless.

the last great one i remember was when i was 16. i was at dunkin donuts with a few friends of mine after smoking, probably at midnight, when they were about to close. we always went there and tried to charm the 40 year old woman into giving us extra donuts. this particular night, we ended up with 7 or 8 extra each, and sat down next to two really cute girls. my friends kept whispering about hitting on them, but didn't make a move. finally, i got fed up and decided to take action. i leaned over and came up with this gem.

"yo. ya'll want some donuts?"

that was really the best i could come up with.

almost the same thing happened to me and my friends walking around after smoking when we were 16. except we went to shoprite and got like 2 boxes of chipwiches. when we saw cute girls walking by, my friend shouts out, "Yo! you want some chipwiches!?"

it was awesome.
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Mark Narra
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 12:56 pm

connor, had i lived in westchester, or you in staten island, i imagine the two of us would have gotten in a whole lot of fucking trouble together.
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Johnny99
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 8:16 pm

i am sure of it.
though at this time i was living in rockland county.
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ThusSpokeYourFace
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Tue Aug 25, 2009 11:39 pm

SirIan wrote:
ThusSpokeYourFace wrote:
SirIan wrote:
If you were a duck and I were a moose, and we had sex, we'd make a duckmoose, and it would sound like this: [make the wierdest sound you can].

cheers

If someone came up to me and said that I would sleep with them. Period.

Where is "the dirty third coast" at exactly?

The Gulf Coast. Texas. H-Town. City of Syrup.

Also, to clarify, it would have to be a really really awesome duckmoose-hybrid sound being made.
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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 9:01 am

Well thats a long ways away, so I'll have plenty of time to practice.
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ThusSpokeYourFace
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 1:37 pm

I'll be waiting.
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Daggar Slade
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 2:55 pm

I could beat you there, Ian.
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StoolPigeon
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 7:27 pm

Whenever I think of the noise a duckmoose hybrid would make, all I can think of is the noise of a dying giraffe from the South Park movie.
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 9:27 pm

StoolPigeon wrote:
the South Park movie.
whoa totally forgot about that movie.... maybe ill watch it again
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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 9:31 pm

StoolPigeon wrote:
Whenever I think of the noise a duckmoose hybrid would make, all I can think of is the noise of a dying giraffe from the South Park movie.

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING! I'M GOING TO MAKE THAT SOUND WHEN I USE THAT PICK-UP LINE!

Next time I see a girl wearing a shirt with an animal on it I'm going to walk up to her and say "I see you like [whatevers on her shirt], ya know if you were a [whatevers on her shirt] and I was a [random animal], and we had a baby it'd be a [whatevers on her shirt + random animal I just said] and it'd sound like this: [dieing giraffe noise]"
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hyperballad
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Wed Aug 26, 2009 9:40 pm

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.
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Johnny99
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Thu Aug 27, 2009 3:03 am

haha, i always liked this crappy pick up line.

you walk up to a girl and get her into a conversation about your watch.
you tell her it is the most technologically advanced watch in the world and it knows everything.
you then say, and right now its telling me your not wearing any panties.
to which she hopefully replies, well its wrong, because i have panties on.
then you slyly reply, Oh God Damnit! this thing must be an hour fast!

zing.
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StoolPigeon
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Thu Aug 27, 2009 5:33 am

SirIan wrote:
StoolPigeon wrote:
Whenever I think of the noise a duckmoose hybrid would make, all I can think of is the noise of a dying giraffe from the South Park movie.

THATS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING! I'M GOING TO MAKE THAT SOUND WHEN I USE THAT PICK-UP LINE!

Next time I see a girl wearing a shirt with an animal on it I'm going to walk up to her and say "I see you like [whatevers on her shirt], ya know if you were a [whatevers on her shirt] and I was a [random animal], and we had a baby it'd be a [whatevers on her shirt + random animal I just said] and it'd sound like this: [dieing giraffe noise]"

Very Happy
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JustinAtWill
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Thu Aug 27, 2009 2:23 pm

Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special
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artistry_in_motion
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:03 pm

Resurrection!!!

probably the best/worst pick up line i've ever heard was

"who's ready for a short night of disappointment???"
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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Sun Mar 28, 2010 9:51 pm

Wow I totally forgot I made this thread. Justin we still need to do this experiment.
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cooljayhu
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PostSubject: Re: Crappy pick up lines!   Mon Mar 29, 2010 2:42 am

hey. wanna grind?
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