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 ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...

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JustinAtWill
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PostSubject: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:21 pm

APRIL 8--In what we promise will be the final installment of the ShamWow Chronicles, on the following pages you will find a selection of police evidence photos memorializing the recent bloody battle between TV pitchman Vince Shlomi and a Miami hooker. As you've likely heard, the ShamWow chieftain, 44, paid Sasha Harris $1000 for "straight sex," which was to occur in Shlomi's $750-a-night room at the lavish Setai hotel. But things went sideways when, according to an account Shlomi gave cops, he kissed the 26-year-old Harris, who responded by biting his tongue and not letting go. Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue. He then went to the hotel's lobby, where security called cops. A Miami Beach Police Department Crime Scene unit also arrived at the Setai to photograph the aftermath of the February 7 brawl, which left blood on the hotel room's walls, floor, door, phone, bed, and towels. Cops were also dispatched to the Mount Sinai Medical Center to photograph Shlomi and Harris, who were being treated for their injuries (both were handcuffed to hospital beds since they had been arrested for felony battery). Prosecutors subsequently decided not to pursue charges against either combatant.



http://www.dailyhaha.com/linkout.asp?LinkID=5133&cat=news pictures of the violence here.

hahaahhahahhahahha
Man.
This made my day a little brighter.


Last edited by JustinAtWill on Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:31 pm; edited 1 time in total
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hyperballad
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:25 pm

why did I even click on that link? are we as people so desensitized that we like to look at the aftermath of a bloody fight?
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JustinAtWill
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:25 pm

Yes.
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hyperballad
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:36 pm

I felt especially bad after seeing the woman lying there with a bloody face. that guy is so gross.
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iloveyourmom
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 4:38 pm

Mnnn. Hmmmm... Especially between a hooker and some prick that makes stupid ass infomercials..
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ashley
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 5:08 pm

this proves billy mays is and will always be the best.
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laurendelore
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 5:38 pm

But it's made in Germany...you know the Germans always make good stuff...
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hyperballad
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 5:56 pm

laurendelore wrote:
But it's made in Germany...you know the Germans always make good stuff...
LOL
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Kyle
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 5:57 pm

laurendelore wrote:
But it's made in Germany...you know the Germans always make good stuff...


LIKE DEATH CAMPS.






uhh.
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Pants
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 7:41 pm

Too soon?
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Vicious
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Fri Apr 24, 2009 8:36 pm

Errrrr... I don't think there's much to smile at in the assault of sex workers and/or their johns.
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Ana
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sat Apr 25, 2009 12:15 am

Old news there, don't ya think Justin?
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StoolPigeon
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sat Apr 25, 2009 9:17 am

Kyle wrote:
laurendelore wrote:
But it's made in Germany...you know the Germans always make good stuff...


LIKE DEATH CAMPS.






uhh.

Can't forget scheiße videos.
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ThusSpokeYourFace
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:07 am

I think what happened is he kept saying, "You're gonna love my nuts" and "Idunno it sells itself," until the prostitute was so irritated that she bit his tongue off.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUbWjIKxrrs

Just in case you haven't had the revelation like experience of seeing the slap chop commercial. I think you'd have to be Amish...
But Amish people do exist.
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laurendelore
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sun Apr 26, 2009 4:12 pm

The SlapChop commercial is even better than the ShamWow one.

Fettucini! Linguini! Martini! Bikini!
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sun Apr 26, 2009 4:32 pm

ThusSpokeYourFace - your avatar freaks me out.
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Ana
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Sun Apr 26, 2009 7:28 pm

laurendelore wrote:
The SlapChop commercial is even better than the ShamWow one.

Fettucini! Linguini! Martini! Bikini!

You're gonna love my nuts.
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Mon Apr 27, 2009 1:38 pm

I watched that commercial and I almost called that number to order one. WTF!?! I don't even cook...
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nickno
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:19 pm

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Ana
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:55 pm

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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:58 pm

For our Spanish speaking viewers:

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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:06 am

Vince > Billy Mays because of this Spanish version right here.
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:28 pm

I like how he uses the Fettucini line in the Spanish version too.
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SirIan
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:28 pm

Aye
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StoolPigeon
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PostSubject: Re: ShamWow! Does not absorb blood....or appeal to prostitutes...   Wed Apr 29, 2009 2:53 am

I like fettuccine.
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